In my infinite wisdom, I have managed to give myself my first black eye... with a vacuum. Yes, with a vacuum.
It is a stupid vacuum that doesn't even work very well. I just use it because it needs work and times are tough. I can't afford a fancy Dyson. I'll bet Dysons don't beat their owners.
I was innocently vacuuming my stairs when tragedy struck. I was using the hose attachment feature to clean the stairs below the actual vacuum. I went just one stair too far, looked up and saw my piece of shit vacuum hurling itself at my head.